Bagels. As good as it gets

May 26, 2013

Israel Matzav: Ethan Bronner complains: Israelis too comfortable to worry about ‘peace’
A former senior aide to Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu agreed, over a Jerusalem lunch of toasted bagels and salad, that most Israelis considered the peace process irrelevant because they believed that the Palestinians had no interest in a deal, especially in the current Middle Eastern context of rising Islamism.

…no he didn’t agree. Islamism is not comfortable.


A Bagel for Hagel

December 22, 2012
(Care for a “hagel” and lox? Um, no thanks!)

Paleo Conservative rump served medium rare. Tastes like chicken. #Hagel can support Hezbollah and terrorists, but they won’t let him be a homophobe. Obama’s Anti Zionist for Defense is about to be eaten by the vultures at the NYTimes. Aw too bad! (SheikYerMami)Brzezinski Backs Hagel, Accuses Critics of Loyalty to Foreign Interests. The usual suspects. Or, if you prefer: birds of a feather. Brzezinski told the MSNBC anchor team, which includes his (unhinged)  daughter Mika, that Hagel’s “critics, they would like to plunge the U.S. into some new wars, promptly, and not always for U.S. national interest.”  (Who? The Jews, of course!) Who’d have thought? WaPo comes out against  Hagel: Chuck Hagel is not the right choice for defense secretary Scaramouche: Obama Set to Appoint “Ferociously Anti-Israel” Senator as His Next Sec’y of Defense; Ironically, His Name Rhymes With “Bagel” Why would Obama tap Senator Chuck Hagel for the job? Mincing no words, Caroline Glick ‘splains it like this: “Obama wants to hurt Israel. He does not like Israel. He is appointing anti-Israel advisors and cabinet members not despite their anti-Israel positions, but because of them.” Meanwhile, pseudo-Zionist outfit J Street high fives the selection, prompting this wry quip over at The Corner: If there were any questions remaining regarding his fitness for Secretary of Defense, JStreet’s endorsement should be the final strike against him.

Bagel guru Murray Lender dies at age 81 in Fla.

March 23, 2012

HARTFORD, Conn. (AP) — Murray Lender, who helped turn his father’s small Connecticut bakery into a national company credited for introducing bagels to many Americans, has died in Florida. He was 81. Lender, perhaps best known from promoting Lender’s Bagels in TV commercials, died Wednesday at a hospital in Miami from complications from a fall he suffered at his home 10 weeks ago, his wife, Gillie Lender, told The Associated Press on Thursday. The couple, who were married more than nine years, lived in Aventura, Fla., and also kept a home in Connecticut. “He was courageous, strong and an example to everyone to show how one should go through life with a vision, ambition, a goal and with success,” Gillie Lender said. Lender’s father, Harry Lender, immigrated to the United States from Lublin, Poland, in 1927 and opened what would become Lender’s Bagels that year in an 800-square-foot bakery in New Haven. Two years later, he had his wife and two sons, Hymen and Samuel, brought over from Poland to join him, according to a history of Lender’s Bagels on the company’s website. At the time, bagels in America were sold mostly to Jewish families who enjoyed them with lox and cream cheese. Murray Lender was born in 1930, and four years later Harry Lender bought a 1,200-square-foot bakery in New Haven as the business prospered. Hymen, Samuel, Harry and a younger brother, Marvin, all went on to work for the family business. Murray would serve as the company’s chief executive and Marvin as president. The Lenders say they were the first to begin selling bagels in packages to supermarkets in 1955. In 1960, two years after Harry Lender died, the Lenders say they started freezing their bagels so they could ship them outside of New Haven without worrying about them becoming stale – the first company to do so. The frozen bagel would make its way to households across the country that had never had them. The Lenders sold the family business to Kraft Foods in 1984. Pinnacle Foods Group LLC has owned Lender’s Bagels since 2003. Murray Lender remained the company spokesman after the sale to Kraft, making commercials and appearing on talk shows. “The frozen bagel is convenient, which is important to today’s on-the-go consumers,” Murray Lender told the AP in 1986. Lender shrugged off criticism by some bagel connoisseurs that Lender’s Bagels didn’t taste so great. “Taste is a very subjective matter,” he told the AP. “It’s clear and simple: We make 2 3/4 million bagels a day. Obviously an awful lot of people are happy with it.” A passionate devotee of the frozen food concept, he was chairman of the National Frozen Food Association and pioneered the first National Frozen Food Month in March 1984, a promotional effort involving manufacturers across the industry. A stroke 13 years ago left Murray Lender unable to talk, but that didn’t dim his enthusiasm for life, his wife said. “Although he lost his speech, he was able to make you understand him with his gestures and his whole body and his expressions,” Gillie Lender said. “It was remarkable. He could bring joy into a room.” His funeral is set for Saturday in Woodbridge, Conn.

Bagel Mood Swings

January 25, 2012

For the first time since marriage and parenthood, I had achieved total control—until I punted the bagel with so much spin that it flipped onto its side and scurried off like a tire on the lam. (Wigpen h/t Simply Jews)

Bagels and eggs thrown at Jews in DeKalb Georgia

December 30, 2011

(Your Jewish News)DeKalb County police are keeping an eye on a DeKalb County synagogue where some members apparently have been targeted, mostly for mischief or vandalism.
Rabbi Ilan Feldman says incidents in the last three weeks include leaving bagels on people’s lawns and tied to trees, but he says that Monday night someone threw an egg at a man walking out of a building at Congregation Beth Jacob.
Authorities also are investigating reports of car burglaries, and Atlanta police have recovered a vehicle stolen from that location.
Feldman says that almost all of the incidents have occurred on Friday nights, when the Jewish Sabbath begins.

#facebook censored Bagels page for this image? #JIDF

June 15, 2011

but the Third Intifada pages are OK?

What Do A Bagel and A Pair of Tefillin Have In Common?

March 14, 2011
image via

First, we had a series of alarms on airplanes when observant Jews put on their teffilen:
This month:

Pilots on an Alaska Airlines flight from Mexico City to Los Angeles locked down the cockpit and alerted authorities Sunday when a flight crew grew alarmed at the behavior of three men who turned out to be conducting an elaborate orthodox Jewish prayer ritual, officials said.
The men, all Mexican nationals, began the ritual that involves tying leather straps and small wooden boxes to the body, and the crew of Flight 241 alerted the cockpit, airline spokeswoman Bobbie Egan said.


A Jewish teenager trying to pray on a New York-to-Kentucky flight caused a scare Thursday when he pulled out a set of small boxes containing holy scrolls, leading the captain to divert the flight to Philadelphia, where the commuter plane was greeted by police, bomb-sniffing dogs and federal agents.  The 17-year-old on US Airways Express Flight 3079 was using tefillin, a set of small boxes containing biblical passages that are attached to leather straps, Philadelphia police Lt. Frank Vanore said.
The teen explained the ritual after being questioned by crew members of the flight, which had left LaGuardia Airport around 7:30 a.m. headed for Louisville and was operated by Chautauqua Airlines, authorities said.
Officials with the airline, however, said crew members “did not receive a clear response” when they talked with the teen, according to a statement issued by Republic Airways, which owns Chautauqua.

And on a ferry in New Zealand in December last.
There’s even a film in the works.
But now, we go from religion to culinary considerations:

Florida Professor Arrested for Having a “Suspicious” Bagel on a Plane
Passengers claimed man had suspicious package in the overhead compartment
A Florida professor was arrested and removed from a plane Monday after his fellow passengers alerted crew members they thought he had a suspicious package in the overhead compartment.  That “suspicious package” turned out to be keys, a bagel with cream cheese and a hat.
…Milatovic, who is a mathematics and statistics professor at the University of North Florida, was minding his business when other passengers turned into super sleuths.  Passengers reported hearing strange noises coming from a plastic bag. State police said later that the bag contained a set of keys, a bagel with cream cheese, some other small food items, a hat and a wallet.

And you thought a pat-down was your only flight discomfiture.